Loose Ends
by Sera
Summary: [New Chapter Added] Ash-Blondes and Malfoys. Cliches that are insane, strange and funny. Other short stories. Enjoy!
1. Ash-Blondes and Malfoys

A Random Ficcy o' Mine by Sera

A Random Ficcy o' Mine by Sera

Disclaimer: Very loosely based on a story by Dick Francis (if it were any looser it would drop off) And, of course, all things Potter belong to JK Rowling.

* * * * * * *

Lucius Malfoy was enjoying himself. He was at a club on the outskirts of London, in a small district similar to Diagon Alley, purely filled with places to hang out. After owling Narcissa to say he was working outstation and wouldn't be back until the following evening, he Apparated just outside the entrance to what was commonly called "Passion Alley". After tapping the secret code (which is so secret that even I don't know it) on the graffiti-covered bricks, a small portal swung open and he stepped through.

He selected one of his favourite clubs, _The Social_, and immediately set about shaking his bon-bon. (If Draco could have seen his father, he would probably have died of embarrassment on the spot, but luckily for both of them, he wasn't.) Within minutes he'd collected a small gaggle of women, admiring his physique. The boldest of them sidled up to him and rubbed her hips against his, while her friends scattered.

She was gorgeous, he thought, looking her over. Ash-blonde hair cascaded down her back and framed her oval face. Her green eyes twinkled at him. His gaze dropped down to her chest (not bad, he thought) and her curving figure. Her long, slim legs were easily visible, as her strapless red-and-black dress ended well above her knees.

"How are you, handsome?" she purred at him, batting her eyes coyly. "Care to dance?"

In answer, he put an arm around her waist as they swayed sensously to the music. "What's your name?" he asked.

"I'll tell you mine if you'll tell me yours," she murmured.

"Lucius Malfoy," he said, enchanted. She was _hot_!

"Rhiannon," was her reply. They danced for another hour and a half, exchanging pleasantries (she was twenty-four, he lied through his teeth and said that he was twenty-seven) before she said, "I'm sorry, I have to go."

Lucius pouted sexily, "I was just getting to know you." Then, as if he hadn't been thinking of it since he saw her, he said, "I'll walk you home."

"How kind," she smiled.

They walked in silence. At the door to her apartment, she pushed her skirt up and removed a key from a pocket on the inside of the dress. Lucius all but panted with lust.

With one foot in the door, she turned and said to him, "Do you have to be anywhere tonight?"

"No," he said, grasping at straws.

"Wanna fuck?"

Well, he'd had many women since he'd married Narcissa; Rhiannon wouldn't be the last, either… but he'd never heard such an open invitation. Before he could reply, she'd pulled him into the smallish flat, thrown him down onto the bed, and was kissing him with such passion that he moaned aloud.

The door swung shut, but not quickly enough to prevent anyone on the outside from hearing a deep gasp as Rhiannon pulled down Lucius' pants and… well, never mind.

* * * * * * *

In the morning, Rhiannon kissed Lucius softly on the lips and said, "So, you're a Death Eater, huh?"

He started to say, "How do you know?" when he caught sight of the Dark Mark, clearly visible on his arm. "Well, yes," he conceded.

She grinned impishly. "I like that in a man. How do I sign up?"

He was taken aback. "You want to… what?"

"I want to join the Dark Lord. A seer told me that there would be a great battle between the forces of Light and Evil. I want to be on the winning side."

He was about to protest, but she stopped him. "I'll do anything for you if you get me initiated. How's that for a deal?" she continued, climbing on top of him. He didn't get a chance to reply, though, as she pressed herself against him and kissed him.

* * * * * * *

Less than twenty-four hours later, Rhiannon knelt before Voldemort, surrounded by his circle of Death Eaters, promising to serve him faithfully until death. He said, "That you will, girl. We'd better hurry. I've heard the Ministry of Magic is on our trail. They have put one of their best men, the Auror named Whittaker, on our scent. We must be done with it and move to a new location."

"Yes, Master," said Rhiannon.

"Now we brand you," intoned Voldemort, raising his wand. She obediently held out her arm.

At that moment there was a great flash of light. All the people in the room, except Lucius Malfoy, Voldemort and Rhiannon were stunned. A great clamour of voices could be heard. As Voldemort threw up his arms to shield himself, Albus Dumbledore strode through the mess and imprisoned him in a cage of light. Mad-Eye Moody grinned cruelly as he did the same to Lucius Malfoy.

Rhiannon slowly stood up, straight and stately. Lucius thought, it was hard on the girl, being caught before she was even properly initiated. He was therefore surprised when Moody stepped up to her and patted her proudly on the back.

She smiled at this, while Dumbledore shook her hand. Lucius was baffled. What the hell was going on? She turned to face him, and casually blew him a kiss. This made him even more confused. What the _fuck_ was happening??

Moody glared at Voldemort, raging helplessly in the cage. "Got you at last, you scumbag," he said, glaring with his one good eye. Then, just as abruptly, he turned back to the woman with ash-blonde hair and clear green eyes.

All he said was, "Well done, Rhiannon Whittaker."


	2. A Cliche...

An Utterly Pointless Cliché (well, aren't they all

An Utterly Pointless Cliché (well, aren't they all??) Where The Harry Potter Characters Get Drunk And Sing Songs

A/N: Okay, so it's a dumb title. What a way to start a new fic. What's it about? Read and see! 

This is my first go at uploading fics in html, so bear with me if things are a bit off!

Disclaimer: all characters belong to j.k. goddess of all things potter, supreme high… yada yada yada… I belong to myself. That's about it!

==============================================

The scene: The Great Hall at Hogwarts, the middle of the night. Harry, Ron, Hermione, and (shock! horror!) Draco Malfoy have been at Hogsmeade, buying Butterbeer. After about, oh, seventy four bottles each, they are only sliiiiiightly pissed (i.e. drunk for those of you who don't know) and since it's the middle of the night they decide what better to do than to sing a song?

(A/N: And… um… I'll use different colours for singing and speaking. Maybe singing will be in blue)

Malfoy:What's better than singing songs?

Hermione:Quite a lot actually.

Ron:Nuclear warfare, the plague, serial killers, blackmail…

Harry:(stubbornly) Let's sing songs!

[Murmured assent]

Ron:What shall we sing?

Hermione:How 'bout "It's A Small World?"

Ron:Well, why not?

[Background music starts up, to the tune of "It's a Small World"]

Malfoy:It's a world of laughter, a world of tears…

Harry:It's a world destroyed in 'bout twenty years

Hermione:It's our world that we share

Ron:And it's not like we care

All:It is our world after all!

Harry:It is our world after all…

Ron:It is our world after all…

Malfoy:It is our world after all…

Hermione:It is our, our world!!

Harry:There is just one moon and a golden sun

Hermione:Which will soon explode and kill everyone

Ron:Really?

Hermione:Of course! In about five billion years the sun will use up its supply of hydrogen and when that happens it will expand, turn red and cool. Of course while this is happening Earth will be burnt to a crisp…

[She pauses long enough to wake everyone up]

Malfoy:We have all done our bit

Ron:To fill this world with (censored)

Hermione:RON!!!

Ron:Huh?

Hermione:Gentlemen do not swear, especially in the presence of ladies!!

Ron:Where's the lady?

Malfoy:Yeah, and while we're at it Weasley here is no gentleman either…

[Hermione wallops them both with an empty bottle of Butterbeer. Harry ignores everyone and keeps singing]

Harry:It is our world after all!!

Malfoy:(dodging Hermione) It's a world of laughter, a world of joy

Harry:It's complete with rubbish and endless noise

Hermione:The ozone has a hole

Ron:So now we're all very cold!!

Hermione:Er… not quite. It's like this… The ozone has a hole, which we made burning coal

Malfoy:(very loudly) Yeah, like, whatEVER!!

[Everyone stares at him]

Harry:And it's our world after all!!

Malfoy:It is our world after all…

Ron:It is our world after all…

Hermione:It is our world after all…

All:It is our, our world!!!

Hermione:It's a world of laughter, a world of care

Malfoy:It's our world and it will always be there

Harry:It's our world, we're in luck

Ron:And we don't give a (censored)

Hermione:RON!!!

Malfoy:(sigh) Here we go again…

Harry:(sigh) Ditto that

[Hermione starts lecturing Ron on courtesy and chivalry and all that (censored) Ten minutes later, they recommence]

Hermione:It's a world that's clean, it's a world that's pure 

Ron:It's a world that's (censored) up and that's for sure

[Hermione breaks two bottles over Ron's head, unfortunately this time they're full =) she chases him out of the room, whacking him as they go]

Harry:(oblivious) It's our world, that's alright

Malfoy:We can fill it with (censored)

Harry:It is our world after all!!

Malfoy:It is our world after all…

Harry:It is our world after all…

Malfoy:It is our world after all…

Both:It is our, our world!!!!

Harry:I thought you were supposed to be a gentleman

Malfoy:Whatever gave you THAT idea?

Harry:Maybe it was the "my daddy is so rich and I'm so smart and all the girls like me" thing that you do every day.

Malfoy:I do NOT!!!

Harry:Do too.

Malfoy:Do not.

Harry:Do too…

[Background music starts up, this time to a popular Christmas carol, which you will 

be able to guess what it is very shortly]

Hermione:(coming back in) On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me…

Malfoy:You've got one, Mudblood?

Hermione:(dangerously, brandishing the broken bottle) What was that, Malfoy?

Malfoy:(quickly) Nothing, nothing!!

Harry:A bag full of Honeydukes sweets!

Hermione:On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me…

Harry:Two magic wands…

Malfoy:Why would you need two? You've already got one, and besides, by the time this song is over you'll have at least thirty of them…

Hermione:Malfoy, can't you count?

Malfoy:(patiently) Granger, I've drunk more alcohol tonight than in all the rest of my life put together, and believe me I've been to some wild parties. My maths is not at its best right now…

Harry:Moving swiftly on…

Hermione:And a bag full of Honeydukes sweets!

Malfoy:On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me…

Hermione:Three French quills…

Malfoy:Two magic wands…

Harry:And a bag full of Honeydukes sweets!

Hermione:On the fourth day of Christmas my true love gave to me…

Malfoy:Four eagle owls…

Hermione:Three French quills…

Harry:Two magic wands…

Malfoy:And a bag full of Honeydukes sweets!

Harry:On the fifth day of Christmas my true love gave to me…

Ron:(coming in) Fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiive Firebolts!

Malfoy:Damn rich true love you got there, Weasley.

Harry:Four eagle owls,

Hermione:Three French quills,

Malfoy:Two magic wands,

Ron:And a bag full of Honeydukes sweets!

__

(A/N: This might go on for quite some time)

Harry:On the sixth day of Christmas my true love gave to me…

Ron:Six scrolls of parchment…

Harry:Five Firebolts!

Malfoy:Four eagle owls,

Hermione:Three French quills,

Ron:Two magic wands,

All:And a bag full of Honeydukes sweets!

Malfoy:On the seventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me…

Hermione:Seven cats a-purring…

Ron:Six scrolls of parchment,

Harry:Five Firebolts!

Malfoy:Four eagle owls,

Hermione:Three French quills,

Ron:Two magic wands,

All:And a bag full of Honeydukes sweets!

Malfoy:On the eighth day of Christmas my true love gave to me…

Harry:Eight Fizzing Whizbees…

Hermione:Seven cats a-purring,

Ron:Six scrolls of parchment,

Harry:Five Firebolts!

Malfoy:Four eagle owls,

Hermione:Three French quills,

Ron:Two magic wands,

All:And a bag full of Honeydukes sweets!

Ron:On the ninth day of Christmas my true love gave to me…

Malfoy:Nine hotties dancing…

Hermione:MALFOY!!! 

Malfoy:Nine gorgeous ladies…

Hermione:MALFOY!!! (waves bottle threateningly)

Malfoy:Okay, okay. Geez, who did _you_ murder to become queen? Nine Quidditch pitches…

Harry:Can you actually _send_ those?

Malfoy:(dangerously) And why wouldn't you be able to send them? When you have money you can do anything…

Harry:Can you fly?

Malfoy:Well, I should say almost anything…

Ron:GET ON WITH IT!!!

Malfoy:Nine Quidditch pitches,

Harry:Eight Fizzing Whizbees,

Hermione:Seven cats a-purring,

Ron:Six scrolls of parchment,

Harry:Five Firebolts!

Malfoy:Four eagle owls,

Hermione:Three French quills,

Ron:Two magic wands,

All:And a bag full of Honeydukes sweets!

Harry:On the tenth day of Christmas my true love gave to me…

Hermione:Ten Arithmancy textbooks…

Malfoy:You nerd. Nine Quidditch pitches,

Harry:Eight Fizzing Whizbees,

Hermione:Seven cats a-purring,

Ron:Six scrolls of parchment,

Harry:Five Firebolts!

Malfoy:Four eagle owls,

Hermione:Three French quills,

Ron:Two magic wands,

All:And a bag full of Honeydukes sweets!

Malfoy:On the 'leventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me…

Ron:Eleven million Galleons!

Hermione:Ten Arithmancy textbooks,

Malfoy:Nine Quidditch pitches,

Harry:Eight Fizzing Whizbees,

Hermione:Seven cats a-purring,

Ron:Six scrolls of parchment,

Harry:Five Firebolts!

Malfoy:Four eagle owls,

Hermione:Three French quills,

Ron:Two magic wands,

All:And a bag full of Honeydukes sweets!

Malfoy:On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love gave to me…

Harry:Twelve days of Christmas…

All:Just so we can start all over again!!

Hermione:On the first day of Christmas…

[The background music stops abruptly. There is a loud bang, as if some very irate

person has slammed down the lid of the piano on which they were playing the 

background music. Yep, you've guessed it…]

Me:(storming out from somewhere) No, you CAN'T start all over again! For one, I've had enough, and I'd like to see you sing without background music!!

Malfoy:My true love gave to me…

Me:On second thought I wouldn't like to see you sing without backing music…

Malfoy:A free trip to Hawaii!!

[I grab the Butterbeer bottle from Hermione and smash Malfoy over the head with it]

Malfoy:Ow (collapses)

Hermione:Why didn't you stun him? It would have been neater.

Me:Do I look like a witch to you?

Hermione:Er… well… no.

Me:(really sarcastic) Ding ding! That's the correct answer, Miss Granger. You have won yourself a lovely stay in the Gryffindor dormitories, where you can sleep it off.

[I try to snap my fingers, then remember from the last cliché that I can't and opt for

clapping my hands instead. Hermione disappears]

Ron:Can I go to sleep, too?

[I clap my hands. Ron disappears]

Harry:And what about…

[Harry disappears]

Me:They are going to have the _mother_ of a hangover tomorrow morning.

Malfoy:(getting up shakily) Are you talking to yourself?

Me:Yes, your point being…?

Malfoy:You're weird.

Me:I get that a lot. To tell you the truth I'm flattered you noticed.

Malfoy:You're weird.

Me:Yes, I think we've been over that …

Malfoy:You're weird.

Me:Broken record much?? 

Malfoy:You're weird.

Me:Maybe I hit you too hard.

Malfoy:You're…

Me:Weird, yes, cut me some slack already!! Look, you go back to your nice little Slytherin bedroom and sleep, okay?

Malfoy:Good night, Sera.

Me:(waggling fingers) Goodnight, Draco.

[We both disappear, leaving nothing in the Great Hall but scores of empty bottles]

================================================

Like it? Like it? REVIEW!! 

(please)

Keep rocking!! 

stay cool --Sera


	3. My First Cliche

A Tale of Stolen Quotes, Eminem Filks, Mile-long Disclaimers, and Utterly Pointless Clichés. With a special guest appearance by Sonic the Hedgehog!! By Sera  
  
A/N: I'm writing this in the third person - I prefer it that way  
  
Sera: Evening all, and welcome to my first, and probably not the last, cliché! *tries to snap fingers then realises that she can't* um… alright… er… *claps hands*  
  
*Harry appears and falls onto Sera's bed*  
  
Harry: Oh no, not another deranged fanfic author  
  
Sera: *slaps him* I am not deranged!! How dare you say that!! I'm simply on a nothing high!! (A/N: Like a sugar high, but instead I get high on nothing)  
  
Harry: *rubbing his sore cheek* Why are you slapping me? Slap Malfoy instead, that would do us all a favour!  
  
Sera: Great idea! *claps hands*  
  
Draco: *appears and falls onto Sera's bed*  
  
Harry: Ouch!!  
  
Draco: *seeing Sera* Oh no, not another …  
  
Sera: *slaps him*  
  
Draco: I was going to say "stunningly beautiful girl" but never mind  
  
Sera: I don't think I want you here anymore *claps hands*  
  
*Draco disappears, Hermione and Ron appear and fall onto Sera's bed*  
  
Ron: Oh no, not another cliché with a dumb title. What's it mean?  
  
Sera: *busy clapping hands and summoning food and drinks* Well, it means exactly what it says  
  
Hermione: But you haven't stolen any quotes… or anything it says!!  
  
Sera: *shrugging* Sure, sure, but this is only the beginning. I haven't had time to do anything yet. Besides, this is my first cliché and I'm trying to make it funny. Anyone like some Sprite?  
  
Ron: Please.  
  
Sera: Ice?  
  
Ron: *taking his glass of sprite* You know, I love ice. It's like water, but it's not  
  
Harry: *impatiently* Forget that. I'm trying to think of what to do to Malfoy the next time I see him. *to Sera* Can you believe, he made me lose FIFTY points for Gryffindor?? All because I told him to sod off, so he ratted on me to Snape. Can you believe that??!!?!  
  
Sera: Yes  
  
Harry: Huh??  
  
Sera: Yes, I can believe that  
  
Hermione: Harry, you should try and mock him. Say something that you know will get him, you know, like how he always teases Ron about being poor and Ron hates that? Find out something about him that he doesn't want other people to know  
  
Ron: Oh, you mean, like the 'nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah' approach to battle  
  
Hermione: Yes Ron, once again you manage to boil a complex thought down to simplest form possible  
  
Ron: *sulks*  
  
Harry: And what if I can't find anything?  
  
Hermione: Curl your hand into a fist and propel your arm in a parabola with sufficient velocity and kinetic energy that when it comes into contact with Malfoy's cranium, his potential energy will change into gravitational energy, pulling him towards the centre of the earth.  
  
Sera: Wow! I actually understood that  
  
Harry: So you mean, punch him on the nose?  
  
Hermione: Precisely.  
  
Ron: How come Harry doesn't get a snotty 'once again you boil it down'?  
  
Hermione: Er…  
  
Ron: You think I'm stupid! Don't you? I feel really stupid! I am stupid!  
  
*stunned silence*  
  
Ron: Alright, don't everyone rush to disagree…  
  
Sera: Okay enough chitchat people, let's get going!! *claps hands*  
  
Voldemort: *appears and falls onto Sera's bed*  
  
Sera: Welcome Voldie!!  
  
Voldemort: *ignoring everyone* I'm Lord Voldie, yes I'm the real Voldie, all you other Death Eaters are just imitating…  
  
Hermione: Dear Sir, Mister You-Know-Who, if you don't shut up right this instant then I will yank out your ribcage and wear it as a hat.  
  
Ron: *shocked* Hermione!! How could you say such a thing!!  
  
Hermione: There's nothing I hate more than…  
  
Harry: Yes, we know… out of tune singing  
  
Sera: *claps her hands*   
  
Draco: *appears… oh, you know what happens*  
  
Sera: EVERYBODY GET OFF MY BED!!! Or it'll break and then I'll have to sleep on the floor and I HATE SLEEPING ON THE FLOOR!!!  
  
All: Yes ma'am *and get off the bed*  
  
Sera: This is really crowded, I don't think I can bring anymore people in. And where am I going to sit?  
  
Draco: On my lap  
  
Sera: Want another slap??  
  
Draco: Oh, you're so kinky, it really turns me on, baby. Spank me!  
  
Sera: *punches him on the nose*  
  
Draco: Ow!!! You broke by dose!!!  
  
Sera: *claps hands*  
  
Draco: *disappears*  
  
Harry: Good riddance!!  
  
Sera: *claps hands*  
  
Sonic the Hedgehog: *appears and falls onto a specially provided cushion because if he fell onto the bed then his spikes would make a hole in it and this is too long for a stage direction but I don't give a [censored]* What up, dudes and dudettes?  
  
Sera: Sonic, use your own quotes  
  
Sonic: Hey hey! Sera! How's the flow, oh radical fanfic author? And by the way everyone, watch my show 3.30 weekdays!  
  
Harry: Ahem.  
  
Sonic: Er.. hi… wizarding-type dude.  
  
Sera: *claps hands*   
  
Sally Acorn: *appears and falls onto Sera's bed* Where am I?  
  
Ron: *his eyes pop out of his head because Sally is in real form not cartoon form and therefore has a bod to die for*  
  
Harry: Herm, this is what I meant when I said that Ron's acting all primal  
  
Hermione: Oh, this is awful. He's turned into a teenage boy. Of course, you'll have to kill him.  
  
Ron: *to Sally* And you are… gorgeous.  
  
Sonic: Hey, dude…  
  
Ron: You gonna tell me to stay away from your girl?  
  
Sonic: If I had to do that then she wouldn't be my girl  
  
Ron: Okay *turns back to Sally*  
  
Sonic: Oh yeah, stay away from my girl  
  
Harry: But you just said…  
  
Sonic: Lehuuuuuzeherrrrrr (if you can actually figure out what THIS quote is, you get 2 Galleons!!)  
  
Everyone else: ???  
  
Ron: *holing his hand out to Sally* I'm Ronald Wellsey *beat* Ronald Weasley! Weasley!  
  
Harry: Not the best introduction ever  
  
Sally: *shaking Ron's hand* Princess Sally Acorn  
  
Ron: A princess?? *kneels* Your Majesty, I swear…  
  
Sonic: Sal, we're supposed to be on a mission  
  
Ron: HEY! I was talking! *to Sonic* Look, pal, why don't you take your little mission and stick it up your…  
  
Voldemort: Ahem. I think this is wanting to be a G-rated fic.  
  
*Sonic and Sally run out of the front door*  
  
Hermione: That went well  
  
Sera: Yeah, but I'm out of quotes  
  
Hermione: Huh??  
  
Sera: Never mind. And besides, I've got nothing else to say or do. Bye all! *claps hands and everyone disappears* Well, that was pointless and boring and not funny. Ah well, better luck next time. Now for the disclaimer!!  
  
Disclaimer: All HP characters belong to the Supreme High JK. Eminem belongs to himself, the twisted version of 'The Real Slim Shady' belongs to be (well, if anyone has the exact same thing, I PROMISE, I didn't copy it on purpose. My version's not the same as anyone else's I've seen) The glass of sprite belongs to me, even though Ron drank it, but sprite belongs to itself.   
  
A Galleon for the first people to review and tell me where the quotes came from, who said them, and who they were said to!! I'll say who won in my next cliché.  



	4. Unexpected Guests

Unexpected Guests by Sera  
  
--This was one of the first fics I wrote, but I decided not to upload it because, frankly, it isn't one of my best efforts. But (to hell with it) it's April Fool's Day and I am on a high and I'm like, why not?--  
  
A/N: Okay, I was going to write a cliché but I've just finished writing a fic based on 'The Call' by (grand masters of music) BSB!!! BSB rocks!!! Anyway, that fic was really depressing and as a result I'm really not in the mood for a cliché. so I'm going to write my other idea for a story, "Unexpected Guests" It's set after Hogwarts, Harry is married to Cho....enjoy!!  
  
Voldemort is dead, Harry reflected, as he hung off the edge of the nearly-vertical cliff face. It didn't help in the least to comfort him, faced with the fact that in two minutes or less, he was likely to follow suit. His fingers were going numb; he winced as the sharp winds bit into his back. His trusty wand was in the most useless position of all: on the ledge. Wand up, himself down. Well, at least I'll see my parents, he thought sarcastically as his frozen fingers began releasing their death grip on the tuft of grass… I love you, Cho, as his fingers gave way.  
  
A hand reached down, pale fingers encircling his wrist. Another reached down, fingertips grasping his. Within scant moments, he found himself being hauled up, and was lying gasping on the grassy ledge. I thought I'd used up the last of my 39572 lives, he marveled. (A/N: He's not a cat, he's a Harry Potter, which is why he has 39572 lives not 9 and he needs them all to protect himself from fanfic authors like myself who keep killing him off!! Hehehe, just my little joke) It struck him that he was being especially rude; this guy had just saved his life. He sat up, enthusing, "Thank you thank you thank you" only to see a flash of silver and a hooded figure Disapparating. "Who are you?" he whispered into the darkness.  
  
A/N I was going to end it there and only finish it if you pplz wanted a sequel, BUT I realized 3 important things: 1. I hate when people do that to me 2. I hate stories that come in parts 3. This story is only 2 paragraphs long as of yet... so...  
  
A month after Harry's brush with death (not the first, and not likely to be the last either) him and Cho were resting in the lounge of their spacious home. Their 3-year old son, James Sirius potter, had just been put to bed. It was raining heavily, and Cho had just glanced outside and muttered, "I don't envy anyone caught in that deluge," when there was a knock on the door. Harry pulled it open. Outside stood a handsome, if somewhat bedraggled, young man with silver-blond hair and grey eyes. (I'm sure you've realised who it is by now) A smile flickered on his lips, and his posture straightened to form that of a proud, noble bearing. "Harry Potter," was all he said "Can I come in?" Then he crumpled to the floor.  
  
Harry just managed to catch him before his head came into contact with the door frame, and looked helplessly at Cho. "Bring him in," she ordered, instantly transforming into Miss Efficiency, and choosing to ignore the fact that their uninvited visitor was dripping rainwater all over the mahogany floorboards. She summoned up a large towel (whether by magic or otherwise is irrelevant) and wrapped it around the youth's shivering form. By the time he regained consciousness, he was in dry clothes (Harry's, and a bit too big for him, but that's also irrelevant), wrapped up in blankets, and reposing near the fire. "Thank you," he murmured.  
  
Cho broke the silence, asking a question that had been hanging in the air unspoken ever since his arrival. "Who are you??" Harry nodded in agreement. Something about the stranger looked familiar - very familiar - something was nagging at the back of his mind that he felt he should recognize...  
  
"What, you've forgotten me already?" the voice was mildly sarcastic, but free of malice "I'm deeply wounded"  
  
Harry felt as though he had been shot. He'd placed the voice - the face had changed too much for him to know it, and even though the drawling characteristic of the voice had been lost, the nuances remained - and they were enough. He looked up slowly. "Draco Malfoy" he said haltingly "You're supposed to be dead."  
  
"Don't think I don't know that," came the reply. "Sorry to disappoint the masses, but I'm very much alive. It turns out I was only a little bit dead, and so here I am! What have you to say to that, Harry?"  
  
Harry paused, deep in pensive thought. "I didn't know we were on first-name terms, Malfoy." Draco had, at that moment, spotted Cho. "My dear lady," he was declaring. "It's a pleasure to meet you. Harry is indeed lucky to have such a talented… and exquisite … wife." Cho giggled and blushed. Apparently the years had not worn down Draco's charm too much.  
  
"Malfoy," Harry butted in, interrupting Cho's answer. "Why are you here? How did you survive? The Ministry said that there were no survivors."  
  
Draco spat bitterly, "They lied. They saw me there, trapped under the rubble of my family's mansion. They heard my cries for help. My mother and father had been killed in the initial onslaught. The Ministry team left me there for dead. I saw the headlines: Malfoy Family Wiped Out By You-Know-Who's Attack. What could I have done? I've been living in the Forbidden Forest all these months, waiting to redeem myself to the world."  
  
Cho's eyes had filled with tears during this speech. "I'm so sorry," she whispered. Harry, mellowing slightly, prompted, "Please continue."  
  
"Twenty-nine days ago, in the dead of night, an epic battle took place at the cliff near the edge of the Forbidden Forest." Harry noted that Draco had not lost the skill of milking scenes for all they were worth, either. "The Dark Lord sought to destroy Harry Potter once and for all. He failed. Their struggle blew my shelter to smithereens. So naturally I left it and went to investigate the commotion. I arrived to see the Dark Lord dead, and Harry Potter hanging off the edge of the cliff by his fingertips. The rest is history."  
  
He shrugged the blanket off, and Harry saw his hands - the fair, long fingers that had been firmly imprinted in his memory. "I'd better be off, the rain has stopped." Cho interceded, "Oh no, not at this ungodly hour. You can stay the night here, and in the morning we'll discuss this further." Harry inclined his head, then went to fetch mattresses. They were unrolled in the nursery, beside the slumbering James. "He looks like you, Harry," smiled Draco.  
  
In the morning, James raced out of the nursery, squalling at the top of his little lungs. "Mummy!! Daddy!! There's a boy in my bedroom!!" Cho took the nearly-hysterical boy onto her lap. At that point, Draco emerged from the room, rubbing his eyes and smoothing back his rumpled hair. Harry made a snap decision. "Well, my boy," he began, patting James on the head. "It's a long story…"  
  
THEND  
  
A/N: Like it? R/R please! If you want a sequel (or even a prequel) then say so! If I get enough requests then I will write one! This was meant to be a serious story when it started out, but I simply HAD to put all those sarcastic (or otherwise) comments in the brackets. I have a bad feeling that bracket sarcasm will play a big part in upcoming stories… so look out!! Heheheeaheeaaheaa *laughs maniacally* Bfn --Sera  



	5. A Dungeon Episode

Untitled by Sera  
  
Disclaimer: All characters featured belong to J. K. Rowling. Please don't sue me, I'm only trying to get along writing a story.  
  
Harry slowly regained consciousness, opening his eyes and looking around. His wrists were held by magical chains, binding him to the stone wall behind him. He wondered how long he'd been here, and groaned softly as he realised what had happened.   
  
He'd been talking - well, arguing - well, okay, having a shouting match - with Draco Malfoy. Draco had pulled out his wand, pointed it at Harry, and shouted a spell that sounded like nothing Harry had ever heard before. The world had started spinning; Harry had woken to find himself in this dungeon.  
  
"What did you do, Malfoy?" he hissed at the figure next to him. "This is all your fault!" Draco opened his mouth to reply, but was cut off by a high, cold voice speaking from the shadows.  
  
"He has done my bidding and has served me well. I have yet to decide his reward." A tall figure, clothed in black robes that hung around its frame like wings, stepped out from the shadows. "How shall I pay my follower?" It stretched out a bony hand and stroked Draco's hair. Draco shuddered at the touch, but forced himself to look the figure in the eye and speak to it. His voice was shaking. "You said that if I brought Harry Potter to you, you would spare my father."  
  
"So I did," laughed the specter. "But when will you learn, boy, that I never keep my word if I can help it?" It laughed eerily. "Bring in the boy's father,"  
  
A short, balding wizard (whom Harry recognised as Peter Pettigrew) scuttled in, dragging a man on the end of a chain - Lucius Malfoy. His robes were torn and dirty, as if he had been dragged through thorns on his way here. Harry turned his head; he didn't want to see the look on Draco's face when his father was killed, Harry knew all too well that no mercy would be shown; that Lucius Malfoy would die, and Draco would be left without a father.  
  
Draco, shackled to the wall beside Harry, stared in horror as the skeletal figure raised its wand and uttered the curse words. A flash of green light dazzled him, forced his pupils to contract violently, painfully, but this didn't prevent him from seeing his father crumple to the floor, to lie still and unmistakably dead.  
  
"Nooooooo!" Draco howled with fury and threw himself forward, only to be stopped by the chains around his wrists. The specter swiveled slowly, menacingly. Draco continued to scream at it, "You bastard! You killed him! You killed my father and he did nothing to you, he wasn't a threat! And you killed him anyway!"  
  
The phantom cut him off in a voice every bit at chilling as its appearance. "Cease your wailing, boy, or I'll do the same to you."  
  
Draco ranted on, heedless. "God, I hate you! You hear? I HATE YOU!! I can't believe I ever wanted to be on your side! You're twisted, you're sick, you're just EVIL!!" Here he stopped, more for lack of breath than for nothing more to say.   
  
"You're afraid for what might happen to you," retorted the figure. "That's understandable. Your kind live in perpetual fear of my name alone, let alone the real thing."  
  
"I'm not afraid! I'm not scared of you! Listen: VOLDEMORT! (Author's note: Who did you think it was? The tooth fairy?) I can say your name! VOLDEMORT! And you're pathetic! You can't even make me shut up…"  
  
Voldemort twirled his wand, once, and instantly Draco's lips were moving but no sound was coming out. Realizing this, he stopped talking. "You bring my patience to an end, boy," the dark wizard snarled. "I think it's time you learned a valuable lesson," He raised his wand, pointing it at Draco. "Crucio."  
  
Harry turned away, unable to watch the torture, even if it was his archenemy. No one deserved that kind of punishment. Draco screamed silently, writhing in agony. When Voldemort lifted his wand, he slumped against the stone, gasping. Another flick of the wand and his power of speech was restored. The cruel, hissing voice echoed around the dungeon. "Before we were sidetracked, I had wanted to ask you two something. Where is Dumbledore hiding? I will give you time to decide whether you will volunteer the information freely, or whether some persuasion will be needed to loosen your tongues," He swept out of the dungeon, Wormtail following him and unceremoniously dragging the corpse of Lucius Malfoy.  
  
Draco straightened and glanced sideways at Harry. "What's the deal with Dumbledore?"  
  
Harry sighed heavily and answered without looking up. "Dumbledore placed some kind of protection spell on me that can only be removed if he chooses to, or if he is killed."  
  
"So… Voldemort wants Dumbledore so that he can then kill you?"  
  
"You're a genius," growled Harry, wondering if Draco Malfoy had a spot of decency in him, enough not to snitch on where Dumbledore was concealed.   
  
Draco ignored the sarcasm. "I'm not going to tell him where Dumbledore is. But that's not because I have a spot of decency in me, don't get me wrong, Potter. That faggot murdered my father, and I'm just doing this to spite him. Clear? I'm not on your side," Draco snapped.   
  
Harry was about to reply, "Crystal," when a thought struck him. "If you're not on my side, and you're not in his, then whose side are you on?"  
  
"Mine, I guess…"   
  
Harry voiced his concerns. "We're clear, though. No one tells him where Dumbledore is…" At that moment, Voldemort came striding back into the chamber. "Will you tell me where he is cowering away from my might, or not?" he sneered.  
  
The only answer he received was silence. "I'd expected as much. Futile loyalty from Dumbledore's brats," he announced. "I have, however, a new guest who might persuade you not to be so stubborn." He gestured with one arm. On the floor behind him, bound and gagged, lay Narcissa Malfoy.  
  
To be continued…  
  
A/N: I didn't want my first fic to be one of those that come in half a million parts, but I ran out of ideas as to what might happen at this point, or I would have finished the story. R/R, I won't continue this unless I receive at least one good review asking me NICELY to carry on.  
  



	6. What If...

What If …by Sera  
  
Disclaimer: Some parts of this taken from The Philosopher's Stone (Book 1) Copyright: The Supreme High JK.  
  
A/N: This is a 'what if' story as in "What if Harry Potter did not join the good side?" I know some of it is really really unbelievable, but I had this idea and it would not go away until I wrote and posted this story. So there.   
  
I haven't changed the beginning that much, only when Harry meets Malfoy in Madam Malkin's Robes for All Occasions, he takes quite a different view of him…   
  
… Harry entered Madam Malkin's shop alone, feeling nervous.  
  
Madam Malkin was a squat, smiling witch dressed all in mauve.  
  
"Hogwarts, dear?" she said, when Harry started to speak. "Got the lot in here - another young man being fitted up just now, in fact."  
  
(One paragraph omitted - too lazy to type it in)  
  
"Hullo," said the boy. "Hogwarts too?"  
  
"Yes," said Harry. He wondered what kind of person this boy was. He hoped it would be someone he could have as a friend, someone exciting, not those nerdy twerps that seemed to be in every school. He was sure that Hogwarts would be no exception. (A/N: In every school, you get some desks, some blackboards, some mean kids … and some nerds)  
  
"Know what house you'll be in?"  
  
Harry's ears perked up. Anything, anything at all that would help him to learn more about wizards and their schools would be useful. "No," he replied cautiously. Then, struck by a sudden inspiration, "Which one do you reckon is best?"  
  
"Definitely Slytherin," came the immediate response. "Hufflepuff is full of losers, Ravenclaw are all nerds, and Gryffindor basically stinks. Let me give you a tip," he continued, winking conspiratorially, "When you put on the Hat, tell it you want to be in Slytherin. My father did that, and so he got in! He passed on that advice to me, and I'm only telling you because I like the look of you. What's your name, anyway?"  
  
"Harry Potter," Harry said, but he was drowned out by Madam Malkin saying, "That's you done, my dear," to the pale boy, who promptly hopped off the stool.   
  
"Didn't catch that, but I've got to run," he drawled. "I'm Draco Malfoy, by the way. Look for me on the train, everyone knows me. See you at Hogwarts!"  
  
… Harry stood on the platform, wondering how on earth he was supposed to find Platform Nine and Three Quarters. He wondered whether he should get out his wand and start tapping the ticket barrier when a loud voice sounded behind him.  
  
"Hey, there you are. I was thinking you were going to miss the train. Hurry up, we haven't got much time left." It was the pale boy from Diagon Alley. Harry grinned in response to his smirk, and panted, "Draco…glad to see you. D'you think you could give me a hand?"  
  
The smirk grew wider. "It'll be taken care of, don't you worry. Come with me." He beckoned to Harry, and together they walked through the magical barrier and onto Platform Nine and Three Quarters. "What's your name again?" Draco enquired as they boarded the train.  
  
"Harry Potter," said Harry, causing Draco to stop in the middle of the aisle and stare. "No kidding," Harry hastily added. "Look…" and he pulled back his fringe to reveal his scar.  
  
"Cool," said Draco. "Here we are." They were in a carriage occupied by two boys who looked like they would be the next contenders for heavyweight wrestling champions of the world. To Harry's surprise, his trunk was already stowed away in the overhead rack. He could hear Hedwig hooting peacefully next to an eagle owl twice her size. "This is Crabbe and this is Goyle," Draco said, waving his hand dismissively.  
  
Just then, a girl with bushy hair and buck teeth came into the carriage. She looked startled to see people in there already. "I was told that this carriage was empty and that I could sit here. Never mind, we can all share. My name's Hermione Granger, and I'm starting at Hogwarts like all of you. My parents aren't wizards, so I hope I won't be too far behind in my studies, but I've learnt all of the set textbooks off by heart and I hope that will be enough. I always had good marks in school, but this is rather different, isn't it?" She said all of this very fast, without leaving any room for Harry or Draco to get a word in.   
  
"Firstly," drawled Draco, "We can't share, because there's four of us and only one of you, and I don't think it would be fair to force us to squash just because no-one else wants to share with you. Secondly, I wouldn't even dream of sharing a carriage with someone not of wizarding blood."  
  
"And thirdly," finished Harry, his eyes gleaming maliciously, "You are the biggest, ugliest, saddest, loser-like nerd I have ever come across, and I wouldn't want any of that to rub off on me."  
  
Hermione's eyes filled with tears, and she left at high speed. Harry and Draco looked at each other and burst out laughing. Crabbe and Goyle chortled as well, although they hadn't the foggiest idea what had just taken place. When the laughter died down, Draco looked at Harry with new respect. "You and me, Harry Potter, we make a good team. Whaddaya say, stick with me and we'll go places. You game?"  
  
"Yeah, I'm game," said Harry, giving Draco a high-five.  
  
… Draco swaggered forward when his name was called and got his wish at once: the hat had barely touched his head when it screamed "SLYTHERIN!"  
  
(Three paragraphs omitted)  
  
"Potter, Harry!"  
  
As Harry stepped forward, whispers suddenly broke out like little hissing fires all over the hall.  
  
"Potter, did she say?"  
  
"The Harry Potter?"  
  
The last thing Harry saw before the hat dropped over his eyes was the hall full of people craning to get a good look at him. Next second he was looking at the black inside of the hat. He waited.  
  
"Hmm," said a small voice in his ear. "Difficult. Very difficult. Plenty of courage, I see. Not a bad mind, either. There's talent, oh my goodness, yes - and a nice thirst to prove yourself, now that's interesting … So where shall I put you?"  
  
Harry gripped the edges of the stool and thought, "Slytherin, please, please, put me in Slytherin."  
  
"Your wish is my command," mocked the voice, and screamed its judgment to the masses. "SLYTHERIN!"  
  
The Slytherin table exploded in cheers and catcalls. Harry, smirking in a manner that he'd picked up from Draco, strode across the Hall and seated himself next to his new friend - his best friend, one might say.   
  
There were only a few people to go. Harry watched a red-headed boy be sorted into Gryffindor, amongst loud cheers from a few other ginger toms. Draco followed his eyes and snarled, "I know who that is. My father told me that all Weasleys have red hair and more children than they can afford. I hear they're so poor that they all sleep in one bedroom."  
  
Harry was shocked. "Wow! That bad? Yikes! They sound like savages!"  
  
"They are," came the response. "Their father, Arnold Weasley (A/N: I know he got Mr Weasley's name wrong, but that's the whole point) works at the Ministry of Magic. If there's anything that can be screwed up, he'll do so. I don't know why they just don't sack him."  
  
Looking at the Gryffindor table again, Harry sniggered evilly. "Look, he's sitting next to that loser girl. I've got an idea, come with me. Bring Crabbe and Goyle," as the four of them rose from the table, Harry whispered his plan to Draco, who smiled; comrades in arms.  
  
They reached the table just as Hermione and Ron got up to leave for the dormitories. Neither of them saw the feet that lay in their path. With a loud "Hey!" and a curse word, Ron stumbled over Harry's leg and crashed to the floor. Hermione followed suit, minus the curse word. Draco smirked. "Let's scram," he muttered to Harry, and the two of them raced for the Slytherin dorms, tailing Crabbe and Goyle.  
  
A/N: Don't think I'm bothered to go further than that…please R/R!  



	7. The Fiend From The Underworld

The Fiend From The Underworld by Sera  
  
It was 2003, and Harry had been married to Cho for two years. They had a son, James Sirius Potter (A/N: Not hard to guess who he was named after!!) who was about six months old now. Harry and Cho were coming home from dinner with Ron and Hermione (both happily married, but not to each other), and it was a typical family scene - walking home in the half-light, hand in hand, pushing the pram… but there was something else - something sinister. Harry tightened his grip on Cho's hand, and they stopped. Instinct made Harry pull out his wand, as a dark figure leaped from behind a bush at the pair of them.   
  
"Stupefy!" Harry yelled. The spell smashed into the figure, lighting up its rubbery skin and revealing a purple hue. Then the shape crashed to the ground. The lovebirds stared at its still form in amazement. "It's… horrible," stammered Cho. "Harry, you'd better take it to Azkaban. Who knows how many people it's killed?" Harry agreed, and used a transporting spell to send the thing to the gates of Azkaban. "I'll be back shortly," he promised his wife, and Disapparated, appearing at the Ministry Office where he worked.  
  
"Yes, it's dangerous, better have it locked away," The Minister in charge of Azkaban nodded gravely, and gestured to two Dementors to drag the still form of the purple lizard into a waiting cell. Harry felt at ease once more, and Apparated back to his wife, who was by then at home.  
  
At dawn the following morning, the reptilian creature turned its green-spotted back on the Dementor that entered the cell. Even as its face was uplifted for the Dementor's kiss, it growled in ire. "I swear, if I ever meet those two kids again, I'll sing my theme song until they both drop dead!" was the last thought of Barney the dinosaur as his soul (his evil, hug-filled soul) fled his body.  
  
THEND  
  
Afterword: A stupid story. See if I care. 


	8. Dead or Alive

Dead or Alive by Sera  
  
Harry politely averted his eyes as Ron lowered his lips to Hermione's for another kiss. The two of them had been keeping up their touchy-feely display all summer; well, what had passed of summer, for they were just into the second week of the holidays that would last for as long as they chose. They had just graduated from Hogwarts Academy of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Hermione, of course, had achieved better-than-excellent grades and in doing so had set a new record as the person graduating with the highest number of N.E.W.T.s ever - eight Harry thought it was, or was it nine? Ron had done well, and Harry had managed as he always did. But it hadn't been the same since Ron and Hermione had started going out - Harry was left out increasingly often, and was beginning to feel like the third wheel in the group.  
  
He rose to his feet, muttered, "I guess you two would like to be left alone now," and stalked from the room with as much of a dramatic exit as he could manage with an audience of none. Turning out of the front door of the Burrow, he paced angrily down the pathway outside, fully intending to walk off his steam and return before it got dark.  
  
Engrossed in his thoughts, he broke into an all out sprint. Run away from it all, he found himself thinking. The thought echoed round inside his head, growing poundingly loud, spurring him on to greater speeds. He ran without tiring, possessed by the growing madness inside him. Unwantedly, his mind continued flicking back to Ron and Hermione. They're probably about tearing each other's clothes off about this time, he scowled bitterly. It's only natural. We are eighteen. He did not notice that the sun had set long ago. With a growl, he threw himself forward -  
  
Right onto a figure standing at the edge of the forest. "What the…" was all the person managed to say before he (Harry could tell by the pitch of the voice) was crushed beneath flailing limbs. Dazed, Harry picked himself up off the boy - then saw who it was.  
  
"Malfoy?" he gaped disbelievingly. "What the hell are you doing here?"  
  
"Funny, I was about to ask you the same question," came the scathing reply. Malfoy seemed to have shot up in height over the blissful two weeks in which Harry had not seen him; he now towered a good three inches over Harry, which was somewhat intimidating.  
  
"I asked you first," retorted Harry, distantly aware of how childish this sounded.  
  
There was a snort of laughter. Harry couldn't see the expression on Malfoy's face, nor did he need to. The condescending tone of voice told him all he needed to know. "I live here, if you don't mind. Your turn."  
  
Harry took a step backwards, disoriented. "I'm where??"  
  
"Standing three feet away from the centre of the universe. Well, mine anyway," snapped Draco, sounding royally pissed off.  
  
"I'm at your house??"  
  
"That's right, Scarhead, were you even listening to anything I said? Now get out before I lose my temper and throw you out myself."  
  
Harry pulled out his wand, and with a haughty glance at Draco, Disapparated. Simultaneously, Draco vanished in a cloud of smoke.  
  
The two of them reappeared almost instantly in one of the bathrooms at the Burrow. Harry did a double take as he saw Draco still beside him. "Why the hell are you here?" he hissed, trying to keep things down. He could hear the Weasleys laughing at the dinner table, along with Ron and Hermione shouting, "Harry?! Where are you?"  
  
Ron was starting the journey towards them. "Harry? Why did you run off? Where are you? Geez, man, was it something I said? Well if it was, I'm sorry. Come out now?" He sounded truly plaintive and pitiful.  
  
"They can't find you here; they'll skin you alive," whispered Harry to Draco, who opened his mouth and drawled, "Well, technically…" but was cut off by Harry's hand clamping over his mouth. Harry shuddered involuntarily - his skin was like ice to the touch. The guy must have been standing outside for hours! He thought. As Ron entered his parent's bedroom, they skidded out of the bathroom and into Ron's room. Harry stuffed Draco unceremoniously into a closet, slamming and bolting it from the outside. He ignored the muffled protests and stepped outside.  
  
Ron regarded him strangely as he emerged, but Harry waived his suspicions by exclaiming heartily, "I'm starved! Let's eat!"  
  
An hour and a half later, Harry, Ron and Hermione excused themselves from the table and headed for Ron's room. Ron and Hermione entered first, Hermione giggling as something Ron had whispered in her ear. Harry almost had a heart attack as he swung the door shut and saw Draco Malfoy lounging on the bed, reading a magazine.  
  
"Evening, all," Draco purred, raising himself up on his elbows and tossing aside the magazine. Ron made a strangled noise and moved away from him.  
  
Hermione, reciprocally, edged towards Draco and pouted darkly. "And you are here, because…" she growled, staring ferociously. Draco looked dispassionately back. Meanwhile, Harry was remembering that breathing was an issue. To break the silence, Draco sat up slightly; in the corner of Harry's eye was a swirl of red as Ron flung himself at Draco, knocking him into a supine position and pinning his wrists.  
  
"Don't … even … try … anything … Malfoy," he hissed through clenched teeth, spitting the final word out like a curse; and brandishing a balled fist inches away from Draco's nose. Draco wasn't completely nonplussed, but on the other hand he wasn't exactly plussed either.  
  
"I'm not clear on what it was I was going to try," he drawled, looking amused at this turn of events. "But if you get off my chest, I'll promise not to."  
  
Ron, looking embarrassed, shifted off the bed, while Draco sat up and massaged his wrist. "Weasley, if you had any brains, you'd be asking why I'm here right about now."  
  
Silence.  
  
"Well?" queried Draco, head tilted to one side as he surveyed the three of them through narrowed eyes. From that angle, Harry noted, they were not more than pale slits in paler skin. Malfoy had always looked as if he'd never set foot outdoors in his life, but at this time the shade of his skin had surpassed anything he'd ever witnessed…  
  
His heart raced as the realization struck him that he had indeed seen that tint of flesh before; it was the colour of Cedric's face, right after the Dark Lord had uttered the two words that would end his short and unfulfilled life.  
  
"Malfoy," he stated into the silence. "You're a vampire."  
  
Draco looked surprised and pleased. "Ooh, well spotted, Potter. Glad to see you're not as incredibly stupid as you pretend to be."  
  
  
  
  
Feedback, people! One of these days I will try writing a complete story… probably not sometime soon. Bfn --Sera  
  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: All things Potter belong to the Supreme High J.K. I also adapted a quote from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Don't sue me. 


	9. Endliners

End-Liners by Sera Lea  
  
Disclaimer: All songs mentioned belong to the people mentioned. All text after the "--" belongs to me.  
  
A/N: What I did here was to take some songs, and add a line to the end! Lines in the first type of fonts are those actually in the song. Lines in the other font are those I added on. Some are funnier than others… enjoy!  
  
Backstreet Boys - The Call  
We're going to a place nearby, gotta go *click as phone disconnects* --Hey! I wasn't finished! How dare you hang up on me!--  
  
Eminem - Stan  
Come to think about it, his name was… it was you. Damn! --I can't believe I wrote that whole (censored) letter for nothing!--  
  
Backstreet Boys - Get Another Boyfriend  
Get another boyfriend! --Of course, that 'other' boyfriend is me…yes, of course it's a sneaky conniving plan! Why else do you think I asked you to dump him?--  
  
Backstreet Boys - Shape Of My Heart  
Let me show you the shape of my heart. --*gets out large carving knife and cuts self open* See? It's a heart-shaped heart! Like anyone else's! Why have you fainted?--  
  
Papa Roach - Last Resort  
I can't go on living this life. Nothing's alright! --I really gotta get me a life.--  
  
Liked it? R/R, if you want me to add any more, tell me the song, if I get enough suggestions I'll post a second edition.  



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